listentomymuse | Spring rain among ice storms

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Spring rain among ice storms

[Ven has been...adapting to Empatheias as much as he could have.

It's been full of ups and downs, the way he's grown to adjust to having a body again after going 10+ years without it. Meeting people he's only ever seen from Sora's memories, connected to his heart. However, nothing could have made him prepared for whatever this is between him and Riku.

Soulmates.

Apparently in this world, soulmates are common, mixed in with how emotions affect them. Everyone has someone to help them, bond with them. Their emotions become connected to each other in a rather...intimate manner and Ventus hasn't expecting his emotions to suddenly click with Riku's. But they made it work, even if there are still many unsaid things left between them.

Riku's still hurting over Sora being soulmates with someone else, and Ventus is wondering if this will be all okay in the end, despite doing what he can to help Riku.

It's why he's been taking little steps to lessen their link a little bit, enough that Riku won't be able to feel the small pangs of hurt that comes whenever he sees Riku looking at him in a certain way - almost as if he's Sora. And Ventus can't confront him on this either.

But they're making it work - albeit slowly.

But it's also why Ventus has found himself at the lighthouse, fingers idly weaving a flower crown together while he listens to the waves below as the stars gleam above.]

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[ Riku likes to think that he knows pain and yet... this is probably the worst sort of pain that he's ever felt in his life. Somehow, the darkness was much kinder than this... to have hoped, to have thought that the one person who has always been of importance to you was your other half, the one you were meant to be with here in this world and yet... upon arriving and upon having those hidden tattoos revealed on the insides of wrists, to see that he and Sora not only didn't share matching tattoos but that someone else shared one with Sora, well, to have ones heart break within this world causes the world to turn gray.

And it's been nothing but gray for Riku ever since.

He does share a matching tattoo with another, as everyone does here and while it isn't Sora, surprisingly, it's someone who is close to his best friend, someone who he hasn't even really had the chance to get to know or even be aware of all these years.

Ventus. The Keyblade wielder who had been sleeping within Sora's heart for years. He is the one Riku shares a matching tattoo with... and he doesn't have a clue what to think of that.

In the beginning, Riku chose to ignore it, not even wanting to acknowledge that they shared matching tattoos with each other and simply chalked up the feeling of being drawn to one another as nothing more than an emotional pull within their heads and that it wasn't really real. That's how it was at first because of how much Riku was still hurting over Sora and Ventus surely feeling like a third wheel that had been wedged between them without even meaning to be, never mind his own issues with coming to terms with being awake and free like this again after so many years.

But as the days went on, that pull between them became increasingly more and more difficult to ignore. Even for Riku.

He knows where Ven is, knows where he goes even without the pull needing to draw him there and it's as he comes up to the lighthouse that he stands back a little ways and watches the way in which Ven gently weaves together his flower crown under the night sky. To see him like this with such a beautiful backdrop... it causes his tattoo on the inside of his wrist to ache, as if to see Ven so quiet and alone like this physically hurts him with knowing that it's his soulmate. Doing his best to ignore this ache, Riku comes up behind him, hands stuffed in his pockets and stops just behind him. ]

You'll catch cold.

[ He mutters, face buried within a scarf as he looks down to Ven sitting there. ]

[Truthfully, even if a part of him wants to hate Sora - the Darkness inside of him that laughs at him for being weak - he couldn't bring himself to. It's not Sora's fault - it isn't anyone's fault, really. Ventus has known for a long time about what kind of Sora is, having been with him all his life. He's never felt envious of Sora, and it's why it's easy for him to keep on with a smile on his face and helping him Sora as much as he can.

But he can't stop the pang of envy upon knowing how close Sora and Riku are. Ven knows that Sora loves Riku, that if Riku had stayed, then the two of them would be together. And Ven?

Ven wouldn't be here - he'd still be asleep and protecting Sora from the inside.

Out here, he's aware of everything now, the kind of awareness that alerts him to the constant draw towards Riku. He's always been more open to that pull, appearing to the other Keybearer at random times to check on how he's doing. He knows Riku doesn't appreciate it - not at first.

Still, he's aware of the sudden ache of his tattoo that alerts him to how close Riku has actually gotten to him now, including years of honed senses of traveling and fighting alone on his journey. It's enough to have his fingers still from what he's doing, the only sign of acknowledging Riku before he resumes.]

I'm fine. [Ven doesn't look up, not yet, and his eyes shifts to the ocean.] It's not that cold yet.

[ This isn't easy for either of them. Despite the fact that Riku has someone who he already loves, Ven has to deal with having a soulmate who may never come to love him as they do another and that alone is a different sort of pain.

Even so, Riku still feels that pull between them, finds that his tattoo aches when he tries to ignore Ven or pull away from him when there's part of him that would much rather be around him. Because the more he seems to fight it, the more he remains stubborn about it, the more it seems to hurt and the more the blond seems to gently enter his thoughts... which is why he's here right now. ]

It will be, especially by the ocean.

[ He knows Ven might not think much of his concern for him, chalking it up to the fact that perhaps he feels it's done out of some sort od "duty of soulmates" within this world and perhaps it very well is. Or perhaps it's because of his taking care of Sora for all these years, something else that might cause Ven to frown as though he might be considered as having a debt that needs to be repaid by his soulmate.

Either way, Riku sighs and comes to stand beside Ven, hands still shoved in his pockets, eyes turned towards the sea. ]

I'm sorry it's like this. [ That you're stuck with me. ] If I could change it for you... [ Change it for me. ] ...I would.

[In the beginning, it was easier to pretend and act like Riku pulling away from him didn't hurt. Like he knows how much of an outsider he actually is, that this isn't the place he should have woken up to. That the people he was expecting to see when he finally wakes up isn't there. But Riku--this world thought that making them soulmates was a good idea for whatever reason, and Ven's never been one to pull away from it.

Between the two of them, Ven's always been susceptible to emotions. Being an embodiment of pure light, some things come easier to him than others, and he's usually an open book, too. The last time he's acted like this was years ago, back when he was - is - still broken and it took the combined efforts of Aqua and Terra to get him to act somewhat like a human again.

When Riku comes to stand beside him, he unconsciously leans against his leg, into that warmth and continues working on the flower crown.]

You don't have to apologize. [Not for me.] There's no need to change it - or anything.

[He's willing to wait for Riku to come around. To accept.

And if he doesn't? Ven's okay with that, too. (Who would want to be with someone who's literally missing half their heart, anyway?)]

[ No need to change it, Ven says. Of course there's a need. Ven is stuck with a soulmate who is moping over someone he's not bound to through stupid little tattoos on the insides of their wrists. He can't even begin to imagine how that must feel and yet... he makes no effort to stop. He does his best not to show it around Ven, sure, but to cut Sora out of his heart, to somehow come to terms with the fact that Sora is not his soulmate after everything they've been through... it's some sort of cruel joke and Riku's not finding it funny in the least.

Ven just, unfortunately, happens to be wrapped up in this when he shouldn't be.

Teeth dragging over his lower lip, Riku watches the way in which Ventus leans against his leg without even really realizing it more than likely. There's something about the way he does it, something that causes a pull to be felt but, as always, Riku ignores it and fixes his gaze out onto the sea in front of them. ]

What are you doing out here?

[ He decides to ask then even if he somehow feels like he knows the answer to that. ]

Listening to the waves.

[A simple enough answer, but they both know it isn't.

His grip on the crown tightens briefly before he opts to take it apart. It's something to keep himself distracted with, to ignore the occasional ache that comes from his tattoo when he can sense Riku pulling away from him. Ven remains where he is, shifting the flowers as he braids them in a different way.]

And looking at the stars.

[He knows Riku cares - in his own way.

The older (younger?) Keybearer has always been accepting of Riku, even telling him how he "likes his darkness" when they first met. That's not likely to change now, and he can't help but wonder: what would happen if Terra or Aqua were here? Would Ven be drawn to them instead?

No, probably not, he muses.

His tattoo aches, a small pang of loneliness that usually comes from thinking about his two lost friends.]

Guess I just really wanted some fresh air.

[ There's a look that Riku gives to Ven that the blond can't see given Riku's standing while he sits there and weaves together that crown. Some fresh air. Right. Not that he totally dismisses such a thing as a possibility but with Ven being his soulmate and knowing that this isn't easy for him, he can't exactly swallow all of that as truth and that, of course, causes him to feel guilty.

Which, it's fine, it's not as though it's a foreign emotion to him given the things he's done. Really, this isn't even the worst.

However, he gives a sigh and, perhaps without even thinking twice about it, Riku shucks off his jacket and gently comes to drape it around Ven's shoulders. Well, as best as one can when just using one hand and not two. Coming to stuff those hands back in his pockets, he buries his face a little further into his scarf, standing there in his oversized sweater while he looks out to the sea again. ]

Opening a window is a way to get fresh air, too.

I've never been good at staying inside. Besides, it was too crowded.

[Staying at the house with Sora and everyone, even if it's occasionally staying in Riku's room or bunking with Sora when his soulmate isn't around, can be a bit...taxing. Ven isn't new to a house full of people, but being around too many people makes him uneasy, too.

When Riku drapes his coat over him, Ven pauses again and shifts a bit so that it sits comfortably over his shoulders. If he ducks his head a bit, a bloom of warmth in his chest - well, it could be part of the imagination, right? Ven gives up on the flowers as his eyes look up at the stars.]

Stop feeling guilty.

[It's a high hope, but Ven feels the need to say it. He's fine with RIku being who he is, the way that even if their soulmates, it might not change anything. His tattoo stings and aches with thought and he exhales softly through his nose, eyes shifting to the sea.]

[ The too crowded thing he can understand even relate to wanting to get away. While Sora shines in a crowd of ten, twenty, even thirty or more people, Riku... doesn't and almost feels annoyed or frustrated with being around too many people. Ever the one to prefer more intimate and close-knit relationships and smaller groups, Riku doesn't have a problem with being on his own out here like this and it's something that he and Ven can seem to understand about each other without needing words for it.

The notion to stop feeling guilty, however, has him glance down to Ven out of the corner of his eye.

He's not all that surprised that he would say such a thing, let alone pick up on what he might be feeling... they're soulmates after all. But to hear Ven say it, to know that it's clearly on his mind and possibly even weighing him down some... that only has Riku feel more guilt and he stands there in silence as he looks off to the sky. ]

Stop coming outside without a jacket on.

[ He mutters the words a little lightly though still clearly means them and as he does, he can feel his tattoo on the inside of his wrist gently pulse, as if happy that he and Ven are talking like this, with one another, around one another and not attempting to pull away or pretend that there's nothing here.

But... it still doesn't have Riku doing anything, making any sort of move, throwing any sort of feelings for Sora that he has away. He... can't. ]

You just worry too much.

[Sora is the sun, always has been. He's the light that shines through the day. Ventus is the dawn and Roxas is the night. None of them could ever shine brightly like Sora can, and that's fine - that's okay. And even if Ventus can pull off the same kind of charm Sora can, it's not the same since Ventus always did prefer closer friendships. His D-Link is proof of that, even if the one he formed with Pete is questionable and Vanitas had forced one upon him.

He can still feel inklings of Riku's mood through their bond and he hums softly.

Ventus experiments with sending an emotion through that bond, a gentle warmth that is meant to reassure Riku that it's okay.]

I've only ever gone outside once without a jacket. [A soft huff.

He grows quiet as if debating something and with Riku out here like this--

Well, may as well take the chance.]

You know I'm not asking you to throw your feelings for Sora away, right? [Ven doesn't look at him, but he shifts away a bit so that he's no longer leaning against him.] I know how important he is to you. It'd be unfair of me to even think about asking you to do anything like that.

[ That pulls Riku's attention away from the sky. It's something that's so very Ven to say and yet, he can't help but feel that it's... wrong. Wrong and nothing that he should be saying to his soulmate of all people. The bond that a soulmate has within this world is not only emotional but physical as well and for Ven to suggest that he keep his feelings for Sora while trying to work through this bond together... how could he say such a thing? How could he not worry that Riku might be thinking of Sora instead with every touch, every kiss, every caress and movement made against him?

That is... if that were to ever happen.

Because he doesn't want it to, doesn't deserve such affection from anyone, never mind from Sora. But the thought of not having that physical and emotional closeness with Ven, with his soulmate... it causes the mark on the inside of his wrist to ache and finds himself trying his best to ignore it as it slowly burns because of his stubbornness.

A shake of his head, Riku turns then to leave. ]

Right. Thanks.

[He's willing to wait, but for how long? Until this world decides it's tired of him and he leaves?

His tattoo aches, a blinding pain that shoots up his arm because Riku is turning away again. He's turning away. The amount of self-loathing is strong and Ven can only do so much. But Riku has never been his to bring into the light, has he? That right belongs to Sora and Ventus can never amount to him.

Perhaps it would have been better if he stayed asleep.

"Who'd want a broken boy like you?"

Hearing Vanitas's voice is almost normal, but it does nothing to ease the sudden chill that flows through his veins. Ice that settles and forms within him that it causes a brief hush in the air. Sounds became muted for a flicker of a second before it returned and Ventus almost curls up against the lighthouse, buried in RIku's jacket.

What would happen if the spring sun freezes?

Ventus wants to reach out as he looks at him, fingers twitching with the need and he forces him to stop - pull back.

Riku doesn't want him. He wants Sora.

The pain that comes from his mark continues to grow, but he ignores it as he says nothing and looks back at the sea.]

[ Riku has similar thoughts of being broken, of being nobody, of not being worthy of being anything more than a shadow lurking in the darkness. Even if Ven isn't as bright as Sora, his own gentle warmth is still nothing that should be anywhere near someone like him and it's also why he doesn't want to accept this, doesn't want to accept Ven, doesn't want to subject him to someone that is clearly no good for him.

And yet, as he makes his leave, as he continues to walk away and ignore the throbbing of the mark inside his wrist, suddenly, he stops.

The ache that he feels... while it touches at his wrist- burns him in a way, there's something else, something... within his heart as well. A guilt that, while not his own, feels familiar, intimate and it has Riku looking over his shoulder to Ven who has himself huddled against the lighthouse now.

Ven. This feeling within his heart... it's Ven, isn't it?

There's a part of him that feels an overwhelming desire to go to him- run to him and carefully wrap him up in his arms with quiet words of reassurance. But it's... it's the bond, isn't it? That's what's making him feel this deep within his heart. It's not real, it can't be, it's trickery of this world and this tattoo that makes him feel what he's feeling in this moment. Because it's only ever been Sora that he's cared about, only ever been Sora that he's wanted to see and be with... and he can feel that shame, that guilt beating within his heart coming from Ven's and it has Riku stand there in silence.

Coming up behind him, he stands there and looks down to Ven, silent in the moment and not even really knowing when he decided to move closer to the blond like this. But, he's here, looking down to him and it's with a frown to his lips that he reaches out with a hand and, while he does hesitate for a moment, comes to touch Ven's shoulder from behind. ]

[It's hard to ignore the fact that Ventus isn't necessarily meant to be here. He's someone who's out of time, out of place even among the friends he's made and his heart is still firmly connected to Sora's in some small way. He's never been good at being on his own, yet it's something he's learned to accept gradually. If they leave this world, Riku will be attached to Sora's side and Ven--no one would remember that Ven even exists. No one would have realized he exists if Sora hadn't been dragged deep into the shadows when Xehanort tried to get his hands on him.

But he's focusing on ignoring the emotion, the shame and guilt that plagues him from his thoughts.

The arm that tattoo is on, the wirst and all - it feels numb, filled with agonizing pain that comes from Ven entirely. He has never really been in love with anyone - RIku may be the first, really. Ven is understanding of emotions, knows how they work, but being bonded in this kind of fashion--

It hurts.

He feels like that small kid that was scolded by Terra, terrified that he's done something wrong that he couldn't help but cry.

When Riku touches his shoulder, frost appears at the contact and Ven doesn't seem to notice his presence at first. He actually wouldn't have acknowledged him, but eventually, he just curls in further on himself. Ven doesn't look at Riku, doesn't say anything, but his fingers tightens around the flowers, the remaining life within them withering away as the storm inside Ventus slowly grows.]

[ This is his fault.

Yet again something done as a result of his own selfishness where he can't see the bigger picture, can't see how he could be hurting others. It's always about him, what he wants, what he feels, what he supposedly needs. Because he wants to be like Sora... wants to be able to follow his heart so easily like Sora does and yet, somehow, he can never seem to and everything always ends up in shambles.

Much like Ven currently is.

The frost from his touch has Riku's eyes widen for a moment and, reluctantly, he thinks to pull his hand away; perhaps Ven doesn't want him here and it's a silent warning that he should simply continue to go. Like always. The thought has his tattoo throb in such a way that it's painful and it burns and it's just barely tolerable as he stands there and stares to Ven's back.

This is his fault and Ven doesn't deserve to feel this way, to feel second fiddle, to feel as though he's not enough and that no one could ever want him for a soulmate. It's just... why... why did he have to be paired with him of all people? Someone covered in a darkness of their own and not born of the light like Sora is and while he tries so hard to walk the path of the dawn, choosing neither light nor dark to commit himself to fully... why does the darkness always somehow surround him and his decisions of the heart? Ven doesn't deserve this.

With his grip tightening on that shoulder, he comes to turn Ven around to face him, eyes of blue-green staring down to the blond as fingers tremble at that shoulder, gripping a little tighter as he's suddenly so aware of his own heartbeat within his chest. ]

This isn't your fault.

[It's not Riku's fault - not all of it.

Ventus has always had issues of his own to deal with, and given that the last person he actually talked to before his heart sought Sora's was Vanitas. His other half. His Darkness.

Everything that Ven was and torn apart from him.

It makes the ice in his body grow, chilling him to the bone that even Riku's coat could never hope to keep out.

His heart isn't as big as Sora's, but it's big enough. He reaches out to people, let them feel the gentle warmth that helps them smile, helps them reach their dreams. He's that spring breeze that comes to melt away the ice and bring in the season of flowers and gentleness. But then again, that's all he is.

A wind.

A current of air no one can see and can't grab a hold of. And the wind and earth can't hope to be matched up, right? He's always meant to keep on traveling, a memory of withered rocks and erosion left in his wake from the damage that he's brought. That he'll continue to bring.

Much like how it is for Sora and Riku.

Why is he here?

Riku is suddenly in his vision and Ventus blinks, startled, but the frost continues to grow, creeping up along the hand that remains on his shoulder. He looks up at him, deep blue meeting sea green.]

It's not yours either.

[Riku isn't to blame for how he feels and Ven...Ven knows where his part lies with all of this. He's always been more of a weapon than someone who could be loved--

He's the broken boy who failed to become the blade, after all.]

[ The frost is worrisome and yet... Riku can understand why it's there. His own ice has chilled him from the inside, the weight of it pushing through his body like shards of glass forcing their way through his veins. It's numbing, a means to try and freeze over any sort of emotion, be it good or bad. To just simply not feel anything anymore, especially in the moment. He knows this, he's done it so many times himself and yet to think that it might be happening to Ven, that Ven might think this is necessary to him or a fault of his for simply being who he is aside from who he "should be" in Riku's eyes...

...it is his fault.

That thought alone causes fingers to curl against the shoulder, cracking the frost that gently touches his knuckles and for his head to bow, eyes falling shut, strands of silver falling in front of his face.

Why can't he... why can't he do the right thing for once? Why can't he just accept his soulmate and this bond that pulls them together- that has pulled them together right here by the lighthouse? Why can't he be like everyone else who so freely and willingly accepts this without question? Even Sora accepted his own soulmate, reassuring Riku that he would find his own and be happy with them, not even realizing how much those words hurt to hear from him. Why is he like this? Why is he so difficult? Why is the need to reassure Ven throbbing against the inside of his wrist? ]

I want to fight this so bad. [ Softly, he admits, figuring that Ven probably knows. ] I don't want to be drawn to you. I don't want some mark on the inside of my wrist to dictate who I should and shouldn't love. I don't want to be forced to be with someone who doesn't deserve to put up with me.

[ Fingers clutch at that shoulder still and there's silence that falls over them in the moment, teeth dragging over his lower lip. ]

But it hurts. [ Another soft admission, he lifts his head, enough to look through strands of silver and see the way his mark burns on the inside of his wrist as he clutches at Ven's shoulder. ] It hurts so much to see you this way, to be away from you, to know that I do this to you.

[Ventus is quiet, allowing Riku to speak and get his thoughts in order. They’ve never really talked about this, about what would happen if they fought against this bond forced upon them and what it could do to them. Ven accepted it with ease, though he knows Riku wouldn’t.

Still hasn’t.

They’ve never spoken in length about it, just that it’s there. It exists, so why bother talking about it? Except that they can feel each other, their emotions linked in a way that’s far too intimate that it might as well be linked to their hearts thesemlves. They’re both hurting in different ways and it’s hard to ignore that.

It’s why Ventus is watching Riku, studying him.

He wants to comfort him, to reach up and assure him that it’s fine, that it’s okay. But he can’t. Not this time. Not because he doesn’t want to, but that he can’t. Riku has always been an enigma to him, so quick in his doubts about himself and swimming so deep in his own self-loathing that Ventus isn’t sure if he could ever hope to reach out to him.

He wants to scream. He wants to yell, but anything he wants to say dies on his tongue or caught in his throat.

In a way, he can understand Vanitas now, and the mere idea of being alone is terrifying without his heart whole—not without Riku.

Eyes sliding shut, Ven eventually reaches up, his hand over Riku’s on his shoulder. The pain is there, stronger now to be felt, but he also focuses on the warmth that passes through them. His mark is soothed by the contact, the pain slowly easing, but he doesn’t say anything again. Unsure if Riku is willing to continue, he doesn't want to do anything that can set him back.

Ven can’t lose Riku. But perhaps Riku can afford to lose him?]

[ The walls of ice that Riku has put up around his heart slowly begin to melt the second that Ven's warmth touches them. It's difficult, so very difficult and there's a part of him that wants to lash out, to fight back, to tell Ven to stop being so reassuring and caring towards him. That he doesn't deserve his affection nor touch nor warmth. None of it. He's pushed at him, buried his heart around thick walls of ice in an attempt to protect himself from this mark- this stupid mark on the inside of his wrist that burns when he's pulled away from Ven yet warms and tickles in delight when he's right here with him.

But Ven is warm, so very warm and in ways that Sora isn't. Sora is bright and shines through the darkness like a beacon of hope. But Ventus... Ventus is that gentle light at the end of the tunnel that one sees when surrounded by darkness and he can feel him in this moment, feel that gentle warmth touching at his skin, at his heart, melting away the ice into water.

Because with forcing himself to be away from Ven, to be away from the one who emotionally and physically understands him on such an intimate level where words don't even need to be said to convey how he feels, let alone what he thinks of something... to be away from that person is a pain so much more difficult than the darkness suffocating him in shadows and Riku isn't so sure he can keep doing this.

Without even realizing it, he takes Ven's hand on his shoulder into his own and presses it against his cheek, the sound of a gentle gasp leaving his lips as he does so. This person here... because that's what he is, regardless of what anyone else may say or think, he's his own person and Riku has never looked at him as anything other than that. ]

It hurts less when you're here.

[The gentle dawn—that’s what Ven is. He’s the light that brings in the warmth after a chilling night, the darkness that creeps into the light. He can feel the ice around Riku slowly melting away, and in response, the frost that lingered between them slowly begins to disappear as well. His light isn’t strong — but it’s enoigh.

He won’t lie. He won’t deny that it hurts having Riku apart from him. That the one person he’s so connected to would rather keep away and pretend this bond doesn’t exist at all.

Like none of this ever happened.

But as his hand makes contact with Riku’s cheek, he stills in surprise. It’s odd like this. He’s never touched Riku, not really, and the other teen never initiated anything either. Ventus would always give him little touches, fleeting and gone like the wind the next minute, and he never lingered either.

And the way Riku is looking at him—]

Will you still try to fight it? [A sincere question with no true desire of wanting to know the answer. Ven isn’t sure what he thinks, of how to feel, and Riku has leeway to continue thinking nothing is between them.

But now? Neither of them can ignore this, not when Ven is still keeping up that gentle warmth between them.]

[ Does he want to continue to fight this? To go through the push and pull that comes with ignoring the matching marks they both wear on the insides of their wrists that bounds them together as soulmates in this world? It's been weeks now, leading into two months about that he's been ignoring this, pining over Sora from afar, having to put Ven through this emotional turmoil that he knows the blond has been feeling because of their bond. This isn't fair to him and it's why he so desperately wishes that Ven was bound to someone else- anyone else aside from him.

And yet that warmth... that gentle warmth that touches his skin and sinks into his very heart calls to him in ways that Sora never truly has. The dizzying delight of the gentle warmth that is Ven is enough to melt the ice around his heart and fill the cold with soft, warm light, a light that is so very different from Sora's but just as strong in its own way. Does Ven even know that? Understand that? Or does he think of his light as dimmer- weaker than Sora's and therefore not as good?

To fight this warmth, to fight these blue eyes that look to him so gently with a reassurance laced with a curious fondness for him when he doesn't deserve it in the least... Riku turns his face into Ven's palm and gently, so very gently, lips ghost over soft skin in simple movement, not a kiss. But it's enough, oh it's enough to make his heart beat louder and his skin to raise in goosebumps as the mark on the inside of his wrist burns in such delight that it's enough to make him shiver and for eyes to fall shut.

It's ecstasy. Pure and raw ecstasy of touching the person he's physically and emotionally bound to.

It's a desire that he hasn't felt towards Sora - not like this - and one that feels so impossible to fight that he finds himself taking hold of that hand against his cheek, reaching out for Ven, and leaning in to brush his lips over Ven's in a kiss. ]

[For once, Ven doesn’t feel a flicker of hesitation, of reluctance. There’s simply a pause, a calm assurance as he waits for Riku to say something — to do something. Both of them aren’t particularly good with words, especially when it comes to how they’re feeling. Riku prefers to keep his emotions to himself, hiding it behind a wall of ice filled with doubt and hesitance whereas Ven accepts his feelings and continues on with a smile on his face.

Even if Riku claims his light isn’t strong enough, that the darkness is always stronger, Ven can feel it. Riku isn’t made of pure darkness, not like those Ven knows personally, and his darkness is kind. It’s warm in its own way, mixed in with the glimmer of light deep within.

He’s become the dawn.

Ven inhales sharply through his nose upon feeling lips ghost over his palm. The touch is fleeting and enough to make it seem like there hasn’t been a point of contact, but he can feel it. It makes his mark tingle in a pleasant way, washing any sort of pain anyway and replace it with affection. With the surge of utmost pleasure at being able to finally have his soulmate like this.

So close.

So it’s even more of a surprise when Riku leans in to kiss him, and it warrants a rush of ecstasy, the way it has Ven immediately relaxing into it, kissing back.]

[ The moment his lips touched Ven's, he knew he was doomed.

That rush of ecstasy that spills from Ven's lips, drips onto his own and Riku finds himself giving into the feeling of wanting more from this blond, from this person, from his soulmate. The world around them more or less disappears and all that Riku can focus on is Ven and how right it feels to have his lips against his own. In a way, it's maddening. It's maddening and addictive and he never thought he could feel this way about someone else as he does Ven and the thought only makes his mark sing in such delight that he doesn't even realize how tightly he now grips the blond as he pours himself into that kiss between them.

To be touched by Ven... it burns. It burns so much that he can't help the gentle sound that he makes against Ven's lips. But it's not as it feels when he pulls away from Ven. No, it's... it's different. It burns in a way where he needs to be touched by Ven, wants to and he finds himself pushing Ven up against the brick of the lighthouse and pinning him there as he deepens their kiss, the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks down below drowning out the beating of his heart that he can feel drumming louder and faster within his chest. ]

[It all feels too—right. Not perfect, not everything is perfect, but right now? This feels right. This feels as though he’s been waiting for this; that a part of him just become completed that he makes no move to pull away or to move. If anything, he responds to the kiss deeper, an insistent desire for more burning inside of him.

His mark tingles, burning with pleasure and it spreads through his body.

This is right. This is all he wants.

It’s not exactly feeling whole, but at the same time, it is. Like another half of his heart has clicked into place and it’ll stay there. As he feels himself pushed up against the lighthouse, his free hand coming up to tangle fingers into silver hair. The sound that escapes from him isn’t a moan, but resembles close—a soft sigh that it alone expresses the pleased feeling that envelops him.]

[ Those little sounds fill Riku with such a desire and need to touch Ven that it practically makes him dizzy from the rush of it all. To know that Ven wants this- wants him... it only feeds that desire that stirs within him and makes him want to draw out more of those lovely little sounds.

Hands come to cradle at Ven's face as their kiss deepens and his head spins in a dizzy delight. Because this feels right, this feels good, this feels like everything he's been missing and wanting from this so-called bond of theirs. To give into this bond, this pull, this desire for the one you share a mark with... it's enough to make him forget why he had been pulling away, why he had been refusing to accept it, why he had been so willing to try and fight it all in the first place.

But it's when fingers slip away from Ven's face and find themselves pushing up and under the hem of his shirt that he feels a shiver rush up his spine from feeling warm skin against fingertips. It's enough to make him break their kiss, to pull back just enough to look to Ven as he catches his breath and blue-green eyes stare into those lovely blue ones that belong to Ven, his soulmate. ]

It's late.

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