listentomymuse | Taking one page, baby, at a time

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Taking one page, baby, at a time

[It had been a simple day, an easy day.

Everyone's out for once, leaving the HOMRA trio and Anna alone. It wouldn't have been the first time that's happened, but there was something remarkably peaceful about it that Izumo couldn't deny.

So, it hadn't taken too long before Mikoto decided to take Anna upstairs after the young princess had fallen asleep from where they were watching a Disney movie of some sort. Izumo thinks they might've been watching Aladdin, but he can't be too sure since he hasn't really paid attention to it.

Knowing Mikoto's likely to take a nap, too, Izumo begins to tidy up, grabbing the blankets that Anna and Totsuka has used and gently nudging Totsuka to help out, too.]

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Just sometimes.

[As if it wasn't something that hasn't been brought it up before.]

It's not our fault that they think you're the easiest to take down. [Because running seems to be Totsuka is good at, but at the same time, it's not really in their nature to run.

He hums softly.]

That's all he really needs.

[More than any of the others—but he doesn't actually say it, they both know it anyway.]

Yeah, it's not. [He may be the easiest to take down, but...even more then normal, the rest of the clan would be out for their ashes to be all that's left.

Tatara hums a different pitch.]

Then I'll stop him if he needs it, and you'll be there to fight by his side. I think that's closer.

[He makes a soft sound, as if silently amused with something that doesn't make sense to Totsuka.]

No one will allow you to die then.

[A glance over.]

There's only so many times I can fight by his side before he decides to go off on his own.

[He blinks and starts fiddling with his blanket, still wrapped around his shoulders.] I don't think that's how dying works, but I know you would try.

[A smile rises onto his face even as he continues to avoid looking back at Izumo.]

You say that like you wouldn't follow him for as long as you could, if the others didn't need your help.

No, it isn't, but it's like to think it'd be different.

[There's a pause, something flickering in his eyes.

Then he smiles slightly.]

There's a difference between being able to follow him and how far I can go to stay with him. In the end, it won't change the outcome.

I'd like to think about it being something like that too.

[Sometimes, anyway.

Tatara looks up, smiling still but something soft and...sad? in his eyes.] We've known that for a while. That doesn't mean we can just stop following him for as long as we can.

You've—We've... The others will still need to be looked after. [They can't follow after his Sword falls, if Tatara is even alive still.

...maybe wishes are something like ghosts.]

[Izumo doesn't say anything before he sighs.]

No. We can follow him. [Follow after his ghost, follow after Mikoto's shadow that is cast upon all of them even if Izumo feels that in the end, the trio will dwindle down to only one is left.

He's not stupid to think of who would have to remain behind.]

Even if the others needed to be looked after, they can't be looked after forever either.

[Oh. Why is it that every time something like this happens, it feels like they're having multiple conversations at once?

Tatara looks at Izumo, wanting to reach out for some reason.]

Can we? Or do you have to? [He doesn't need to bring Mikoto's guilt over the two of them into this anymore than he needs to remind Izumo where all his videos of the clan's precious memories are.]

But we still should for as long as we can. [Look after the others... He wants to reach out—so he does, grabbing part of one of Izumo's sleeves as soon as he's close enough.] We should keep looking after them, no matter what happens. [Though Tatara doubts he'll still be alive to help.]

We both know that I don't have to do anything, Totsuka. In the end, we both know what will happen.

[This is why Izumo hates dreaming, hates the idea of his two friends dying before his eyes. He could lie, but what good would that do for either of them in the end?

Nothing.

When he feels Totsuka grab his sleeve, he stops but he doesn't quite turn to look at him yet.]

We can always look after them, but it'd be good to let them find their own place in the world again. No one's world can remain small forever.

Being forced to and what you will do are both "have to" Kusanagi-san. If that's the only option you'll think about, it may as well be the only option.

[...he hates this. He knows exactly what they're talking about now, just not directly and... For the clan, it makes sense that Izumo would be the one to remain behind, should be the one to remain behind, but. The three of them started this. The two of them took Mikoto's hands together.

He knows what'll happen.]

...what about Anna? [There's no use pretending he doesn't also know how this'll end for him anymore.]

Don't do this right now, Totsuka.

[Don't make him be the one to talk about this right now.

His expression shifts a bit before he gently bonks him on the head.]

Who knows. Maybe one day she can be reunited with Honami.

If not now, then when? [Will they actually have another time when they're alone, the rest of the clan, including the King and the princess, not present?

He doesn't want to talk about it either but... Isn't it...won't it be better, for Izumo, for them to talk about it before he's left behind?

...but at Honami, Tatara's smile fades. It's not even because of being hit on the head.] ...She can't remember. Even if Anna sees her, it wouldn't be her niece that Honami would be seeing. [He's not sure the Rabbits would allow Honami to remember, even if somehow the Dresden Slates were taken care of.]

There will always be another time. [Maybe.

But Izumo is reluctant to talk about it. Talk about the potential future ahead of them because whether he likes it or not, he knows he'd be the last one standing out of the three of them.

Izumo breathes out quietly.] No, it wouldn't be, but Anna does deserve some semblance of a normal life.

Do you really want to wait for that other time? [One that they both know may never actually happen, not with everything that's happening around them.

Not with Anna's words ringing in Tatara's head like a reminder of how long he may have left, as long as he stays with Mikoto and Izumo.

It's not long, not as long as it could be, and there's still no way he's going to tell them that.

He looks at the ground.] ...We'll just have to give her as close as we can for as long as we can. [Honami might hurt more.]

That's a hard question to answer, isn't it.

[Because they already know the truth.

Izumo looks over at him, quiet.

Then he sighs and looks away.]

We will. [In some ways.]

[He was just asking if he really wanted to wait for another time... But maybe it's the hope of another time that makes it a hard question to answer.

...well.]

We can't do much about other groups and this but, do you think she'd like going to the mountains? [What's a normal life]

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Taking one page, baby, at a time

It might have been.

Somehow this is going a different way than thought but OK

lmao

At least they are talking and it is not terrible yet?

Thats true...for now

LIN

WHAT

c: now it is fine

/snort

Meaaaaaaaaan

never mean

if you're never mean, i'm never mean

laughs

c: it's perfect logic

that is some messed up logic

Either both or neither- so both, yes