listentomymuse | Spring rain among ice storms

Entry tags:

Spring rain among ice storms

[Ven has been...adapting to Empatheias as much as he could have.

It's been full of ups and downs, the way he's grown to adjust to having a body again after going 10+ years without it. Meeting people he's only ever seen from Sora's memories, connected to his heart. However, nothing could have made him prepared for whatever this is between him and Riku.

Soulmates.

Apparently in this world, soulmates are common, mixed in with how emotions affect them. Everyone has someone to help them, bond with them. Their emotions become connected to each other in a rather...intimate manner and Ventus hasn't expecting his emotions to suddenly click with Riku's. But they made it work, even if there are still many unsaid things left between them.

Riku's still hurting over Sora being soulmates with someone else, and Ventus is wondering if this will be all okay in the end, despite doing what he can to help Riku.

It's why he's been taking little steps to lessen their link a little bit, enough that Riku won't be able to feel the small pangs of hurt that comes whenever he sees Riku looking at him in a certain way - almost as if he's Sora. And Ventus can't confront him on this either.

But they're making it work - albeit slowly.

But it's also why Ventus has found himself at the lighthouse, fingers idly weaving a flower crown together while he listens to the waves below as the stars gleam above.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[There's not many people Ven has asked to stay with him. In fact, he hasn't asked anyone to be with him at all. With Terra and Aqua, it's easy to make promises with each other that they'll be together always only to be torn apart. With Sora, Ven has only been planning to sleep long enough until his heart has restored -- but not once has he actually told anyone what he wants.

Not like this.

So, it's always been different with Riku, long before their marks managed to appear and drew them together. Before, they were friends - not close enough, but they did get along. Their first meeting clicked well and they told each other things they haven't told anyone else before. How did this mark come to get in the way and set them apart?

When Riku asks him that question, he isn't surprised. Despite his own carefree nature, despite how similar he can really be to Sora in terms of naivety and energy, Ven has always been a little more on the serious side. He has learned to think and to use his wits most of the time to help him out of a pinch, and thinking about this isn't any difference.

If things had been different, would he still look at Riku this way?

A question he had asked himself the moment he realized who his soulmate is, who it bounded him to, and one he always asked himself when Riku had begun to pull away from him.]

Yes. [While the answer may be simple, it's straightforward - it's not a lie. His eyes look right into Riku's.] Even if this doesn't exist - even if there wasn't a bond that pulled us together - you'd still be the only person I want.

[Because Riku is the first person to talk to him as Ventus. He had never looked at him as anyone else, despite Ven's fears. Because this feeling that Ven has for Riku now isn't a feeling that can only be developed through a bond but through connection and actually talking to him. Just like how it was in the beginning before they realized their marks.]

[ you'd still be the only person I want.

Words that Riku never thought he would hear addressed to him, about him and there they are, spilling so effortlessly from Ven's lips and leaving him speechless in the moment.

Despite the bond, despite the shared marks that they wear on the insides of their wrists, despite the rules and everything that they're supposed to do or supposed to not do... despite all of that, Ven would still choose him. Ven... would choose him... of all people, even without this pull, even without these marks, even without some 'higher power' saying so. He would do it on his own and that alone causes something within Riku to swell.

There's something about this moment, something that doesn't feel as though he's being pulled by the shared bond they're wrapped up in. No, he's not being forced, not being coerced into coming closer to Ven. It's all on his own, all of his own doing, all of his own desire. This is what he wants right here, right now.

Ven is what he wants.

And so he dips in, catching those lips in another kiss and he pours whatever amount of emotion that he can into it, hoping to have it brush against Ven's lips and slip into his mouth, tasting the sweetness that he is making him feel in this moment. Because to kiss Ven like this... it's like kissing sunshine and spun sugar and it's the sweetest, warmest thing he's ever felt. ]

[He waits, almost anxiously, to hear or see Riku’s response. He knows that Riku might not believe him, not completely, but it’s the truth.

Bond or no bond, Riku will remain to be the person that he wants.

There’s a thrumming between their bond, the way his mark aches as if pleased and content with his choice. As if saying that’s right. This will always be the person you’ll choose. This will always be the person you love because it has always been your choice.

So, it’s easy to surprise Riku dips in to kiss him and he can feel the emotions being poured into it. Feeling it brush against him, through their bond, has him sighing into the kiss as he returns it. His hand comes up, fingers tangling into Riku’s hair.]

[ He can't say that he deserves such a person like Ven in his life, let alone being wanted by such a person. Ven is a warmth so much more different from Sora and that's perfectly ok and something that Riku appreciates. No, Ven is not Sora. He's his own person with his own heart, his own heart, his own hopes and dreams and even insecurities... it's for that reason that Riku appreciates him, that Riku is here like this right now... that Riku is allowing his emotions to spill into this kiss.

He deepens the kiss, holding tight to Ven, knowing that he needs to let him go and turn in for the night. But right now, here in this moment, where Ven has more or less reassured him of wanting him... he doesn't want to let go of this moment and just enjoy it for a little while longer. Enjoy those fingers that so carefully card their way through silver strands of hair.

He cradles Ven's face so gently within the palm of his hand, thumb stroking over soft skin before he finally finds it within him to break their kiss, though makes little effort to really pull back much from him. ]

I'm sorry. [ He murmurs, still so close against Ven. ] For how I've treated you... how I've treated this.

[ Because Ven hasn't deserved any of it. ]

[He can easily feel Riku’s emotions pouring into him, through their kiss, and he can’t help but send a wave of warmth over him in return. Ven will easily argue against him about what it means to deserve someone, to feel like they truly deserve to feel this kind of affection. But it doesn’t matter. Riku sees him. Sees who he is and that’s enough for Ventus.

When the kiss deepens, the fingers curled in silver strands tightens their grip briefly. It’s not like the kiss from earlier — this time, he can feel Riku’s sincere passion into it and that’s...that’s something that makes his head spin. So when Riku pulls away, an involuntary whimper escapes at the loss and he has to focus briefly on what’s being said to him.

Ven blinks, listening and he sighs softly. Lips quirking up into a smile, he gently pushes Riku’s head down enough so that their foreheads are touching.]

...It’s alright.

[What matters now is that Riku’s here. He’s here and that’s all Ven could really ask for.]

[ It's alright, he says. But... is it? Is it really alright with how he's treated their bond and, by association of it, how he's treated Ven? None of this is Ven's fault, let alone his own when it comes to picking soulmates for one another. It's more like luck of the draw with who you might find yourself paired with and, in all honesty, it could be so much more worse than Ven... and, in turn, so much more worse than himself for Ven.

But somehow, it's no excuse for how he's treated this, how he's pushed away from not only the pull that comes with one's soulmate, but just pulling away from Ven in general, forcing an invisible wedge between them in some attempt to keep him from feeling anything for the blond. But not even realizing how that might make Ven feel, let alone question his own worth.

Riku doesn't pull back when Ven pulls his forehead against his own and, instead, blue-green eyes stare into bright blue as he slowly blinks and gently allows a sigh to slip from his lips. ]

It's not. But I know you forgive too easily.

[ It's... something that he can admire, at times, when it comes to Ven and even Sora. The way in which they're so ready and easy to forgive those they care for when no one in their right mind would blame them for feeling slighted and want time away. Yet here he is, pressing their foreheads together and letting him know that he wants him, that it's ok, that he's more or less forgiven him.

He really doesn't deserve this person here. ]

You shouldn't forgive me.

[You should't forgive me.

Something...about that makes Ven almost want to laugh. He doesn't, but it doesn't stop the mirth from appearing in his eyes, the way the wind picks up around them playfully. Considering all that Ventus has done that has led up to this point? Perhaps it should be the other way around, but he doesn't say it.

They can go back and forth on this all night, and he knows there will be no clear winner in the end.

Right now, it's simply comforting to have Riku like this, foreheads pressed close together. Ven has always been good when it comes to physical contact, the slight comfort it brings of having someone close. He's not overly affectionate like Sora is, not the kind of person who would tackle people into a hug out of sheer joy or relief, but his gestures are subtle - blunt in a way. ~~He's the perfect balance of Sora and Roxas, after all.~~

For Ven to be told he forgives easily? Maybe it's true, but he's also an embodiment of pure light whereas his Darkness is still missing, still cut from him even though he was sure that they had united in a way.

So, he laughs softly - not boisterous and the kind of laugh that sounds more like wind chimes.]

You say that, but I see no reason not to forgive you either. [Another wave of warmth sent to Riku, the way his fingers idly stroke through his hair in an affectionate manner.] Don't beat yourself up too much.

[ The warmth that rolls off Ven is a comfort that Riku didn't even know he needed from the blond but each and every time he does it, he finds himself slowly relaxing in it.

He knows the both of them could continue this all night long, into forever, really, both of them being stubborn in their own ways, even if Riku's are a little more on the self-loathing side of things. But with Ven here like this, with the touch of his skin beneath his fingertips and the way that warmth gently continues to roll over him like a spring freeze carrying the scent of flowers and blades of grass, he finds himself sighing softly and allowing his eyes to fall shut while foreheads still press against each other. ]

If I don't beat myself up, who's going to do it for me?

[ A joke. A simple, playful joke that he offers with even just the hint of a smile as eyes slowly open and he looks into those blue eyes again. ]

I will. [Blunt, to the point. Even if it's accompanied by a gentle smile.

In a way, it's a little easier to see who Ventus is behind these gestures. The jaded Keyblade Master who had seen things, had fought his own Darkness, and is a person out of time. But despite the hardships, despite everything that's been done, it's still Ventus - the dawn of spring, the warm wind that comes to gently melt winter's ice. Not like Sora. Not like Roxas. And definitely not like Vanitas.]

I can always just punch you if it'd make you feel better.

[ Well, nothing like the direct approach, right?

Ven's words maybe get Riku to smile a little, though he does his best to try and hide that before he steals a quick but gentle kiss from those lips. ]

I didn't know you liked it so rough.

[ Again, his words are meant to tease and this time, he allows his smile to show through, even if it's gentle and a little bit shy.

Coming to pull back then, he glances off towards the place which Ven is staying in before his attention falls back onto the blond... and then on his tattoo. It feels so warm- so pleased in this moment that it almost feels like a comfort to him with his being so close to Ven like this, with his not fighting against it or trying to argue with himself with why it's wrong, why it shouldn't be, why it just couldn't work. To give in... it isn't always so bad, is it? ]

You should get some rest.

You still have a lot to learn about me.

[A small bubble of laughter escapes from him after Riku steals another kiss.

Especially because Riku is smiling, no matter how small and shy, and for Ventus, that's enough. It makes him pleased, sparkles of light appearing over his shoulders. He knows that there's still a lot they have to go through together, but as long as they're together, it's fine. They can make it.

His mark is warm, a wave of pleasant tingling spreading through him. Satisfied and content, no longer burning with the pain that Ven has been dealing with for almost two months now. This is why he's waited - to see if Riku will be alright with this in the end. It's like two halves finally making a whole and for Ven--that's honestly all he ever wants.

He tilts his head to the side.]

You, too. [And it's getting colder out now. He's not sure if any of their housemates will come looking for them, but it's late and there will always be other times to talk about this.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Spring rain among ice storms

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject